Wandering the internet.
Reading an article.
Notice this ad:
Am suddenly aware of fact that this ad is not effective, as my thought at reading “See Kiefer Sutherland as you’ve never seen him before” is this:
I’ve never seen him naked when he was a cute twentysomething.
Suspect this is not the “never seen before” that is meant.
#AdFail
I often hear people talk about life as a journey.
To me, the word journey seems too passive, almost as if we are just going along for the ride. I think of a journey as a trip, something with a beginning, an end, and a destination: a journey down The Nile River, a journey across China. On a journey you board the boat or train and it carries you along, with maybe one or two small adventures along the way, though, generally, it’s uneventful.
I think of life as a quest, a journey with a purpose and things to learn and discover along the way.
Dictionaries use phrases like a trip from one place to another to define the word journey. When you look up the word quest you see words like this in the definition: seek, search, pursue – all words, that seem to me, to imply a much more active roll in life.
So, if you don’t mind, I’m going to seek, search and pursue my way through this quest called Life.
For your consideration, a word encountered by chance in the Webster’s New World Dictionary: “proud flesh: [from notion of swelling up] an excessive growth of flesh around a healing wound.”
The question then becomes: if there is no excessive growth of flesh around said wound, does that mean you have self-conscious flesh??
I’m not sure which of us has “reached an age,” my mother (88) or I (46), where bowel movements, or lack thereof, seems to be perfectly reasonable dinner conversation.
Typically talk shows have some sort of lead-in, hoping to make you interested enough to watch:
“Tonight, Jay’s guest Jennifer Lopez talks about her divorce from Mark Anthony and her new line of clothing.”
Yawn.
Who cares.
Here’s one lead-in that would definitely get my attention:
“Tonight on Piers Morgan, former First Lady Laura Bush tells Piers about the midnight voodoo rituals she attended in the White House Rose Garden, and, later, she’ll take your calls about proper voodoo etiquette.“
Two words everyone needs to live by: Courtesy Flush.
Two more words: Courtesy Silence. The human race has survived for many thousands of years, surviving conditions much worse than we now experience on a daily basis. In fact, the human race survived plague, famine, war, climate changes, and all sorts of catastrophes, all without the use of a cell-phone. I cannot imagine anything that was of such vital importance that one would feel the need to sit on a toilet, in a public restroom, and carry on a conversation on their cell-phone. Public restrooms, like Public Libraries demand silence.
I’m trying to decide if being overly-excited that one of the grocery stores has avocados on sale for $o.88 each is a sad commentary on where I am in life.
When people walk down the street, wearing red fuzzy slippers, did they have more important things on their mind when they left home than to worry about if they had shoes on? Do they just wear them, thinking that no one will notice? Are they trying to make a fashion statement? Or are they saying “Fuck you! They’re comfortable and I don’t care what you think!”?
The world would be a much better place if french fries and cheese were the healthy alternatives to broccoli and brussel sprouts.
Don’t you hate when you’re getting ready to update your Facebook status with a particularly well-thought bit of snark, a status that’s oozing with th
ick globs of sarcasm, dripping with a bit of condescension, and just a touch of self-righteousness, all indirectly directed at one particular person, and, then, just before you hit the Post button, you suddenly realize that A) you’re guilty of doing the same thing that your comment is implying, and B) the person that you’re indirectly directing the comment at has unfriended you, so they’d totally miss your status update anyway?
